thread: where do anti-contacts come from?

## thread: where do anti-contacts come from?

#### 23 March 2019
from twitter and bluesky threads

### bly

| Thanks to the label anti-contact there is a new way for pedophiles to identify. Once upon a time, before @virpeds, there was no such thing as an "anti-contact MAP" community. People like me and others stayed away from other MAPs for fear of being drawn into activities that were dubious... or worse than dubious. Now we (there are many of us) have found > > we are not afraid to speak online as pedophiles because there is this label - "anti-contact", that enables us to explain that despite being attracted to children, we are not for sexual abuse. Not now and not in the future. The label is like all labels, a generalisation. > > It doesn't perfectly describe all the nuances of our individual views on every one of the many issues connected to pedophilia, abuse, consent, exploitation and fantasy. No label can. But if the broad category of anti-contact hadn't existed, and championed by others in public > > I and many others would have stayed in the closet, afraid that speaking up might mean (as opponents of online MAPs argue) normalising abuse. Since @virpeds, and Ender Wiggin, there's a new narrative in the world. People like me don t have to stand with abusers or defend > > abuse and that is, for us, the only comfortable place to stand. I don't think this makes me or anti-contacts better than anyone else of different beliefs or than those who have offended - there are many and varied reasons this happens. I *do* think that the emergence of > > the anti-contact MAP is inconvenient from the point of view of those in the previous generation of pedophiles, who tolerated sexual exploitation of children, and who couldn't see a separation between "what MAPs want" and the legalisation of abuse. I never felt comfortable > > with the idea of lining up with such people and I am not comfortable now. This is why I use the label "anti-contact", which helped me find people who understood this the way I understand it, and which I will continue to use in the hope that there are many more MAPs > > that feel this way than otherwise, and always have been. I hope the lifting of stigma against all MAPs - all those with an unchosen attraction - will gradually reveal that picture. And I want more people like me to feel safe to speak out. :: About the author: I have been writing and talking about the experience of being a pedophile since 2017. Once on twitter until my account was banned in 2020, I co-led Virtuous Pedophiles from 2021 to 2025. I now continue to look for ways to improve the lives of pedophiles, but never at the expense of harming children. I have never viewed illegal material, and never sought or engaged in sexual activity with any child. The rest of my life is countryside walking, friends, Radio 3 and feeling doleful about ageing. |

tags for this item

tags for this item

censorship36
ethics of attraction32
pedophile communities15
social media37

other relevant items

other relevant items

thread: welcome, pandemic maps! |  | saving kids from cp |  | the twitter pedophile debate
bly Advice based on three years of social media maptivism. |  | ethan edwards We want kids protected from child pornography - both as victims and as users |  | ethan edwards One main hope we have is that pedophiles will similarly hear a Virtuous Pedophiles message, recognize themselves and that they are not alone, and feel relief and empowerment.

thread: welcome, pandemic maps! bly Advice based on three years of social media maptivism.
saving kids from cp ethan edwards We want kids protected from child pornography - both as victims and as users
the twitter pedophile debate ethan edwards One main hope we have is that pedophiles will similarly hear a Virtuous Pedophiles message, recognize themselves and that they are not alone, and feel relief and empowerment.