the neglected older pedophile

## the neglected older pedophile

#### 14 July 2015
from celibate pedophiles

### ethan edwards

| A pedophile who is struggling is a better news item than someone who is peaceful and relatively contented. Ethan Edwards is the co-founder of Virtuous Pedophiles. Blog posts reflect his personal views, and are not statements from the organization. With some regularity, we at Virtuous Pedophiles are approached by journalists hoping to find a pedophile to interview. Out of the hundreds of members who are active, there are often many to choose from. What do the journalists want? They want someone who has struggled with the attraction, someone who has had difficulty resisting their desires, someone who has had difficulty finding mental health professionals to help them, and someone young. All of these choices make sense. Obviously anyone who is struggling is a better news item than someone who is peaceful and relatively contented. The difficulty with finding mental health resources also makes perfect sense. It is a problem with concrete solutions — create a program for young pedophiles. Or train therapists better. Relax mandatory reporting laws. If on the other hand the moral of the story is that people ought to be more open-minded about celibate pedophiles, there's no obvious action item. You can't lobby your legislators to mandate more open-mindedness. For skeptics and moral conservatives, the primary motivation to care about pedophiles is as a means of protecting children. We may be disgusting and they may even hope we suffer, but if we need counseling to help protect the children, then that's a proposal worth listening to. And then there's age. We ourselves on try to appeal to people by considering what they would do if their own teen son turned out to be a pedophile. More broadly, adults feel greater concern for 15-year-old nephew Kyle than they do for 60-year-old Uncle Fred. In general, young people are more impulsive than older people. Young men commit the majority of crimes in society. Despite the stereotype of the pedophile as an old guy, most sex crimes too are committed by young men. And there's also the matter of a demonstrated track record. If a guy at the age of 40 is a serial child molester, society will be desperate to find some way to make him stop. He is also old news. But if a guy at the age of 40 has never abused a child sexually, then somehow or other he's got things figured out. If he hasn't offended yet, common sense suggests he won't offend in the future either. This all makes sense. Young people in general need more guidance and support. Young men pose the greatest danger. They are the more appealing figures to present to readers, listeners, or viewers. On the other hand, we older pedophiles do exist. And what are we, chopped liver? The moderators at Virtuous Pedophiles are mostly over 40. In a recent discussion, many shared a feeling of mild resentment that no one wants to interview us or talk about us. No one wants to congratulate us on successfully navigating a life played in "expert mode". No one wants to write about the loneliness we feel. For just this one paragraph, let me give a small "hrrumph!" on behalf of us overlooked older celibate pedophiles. We're ecstatic that journalists are showing interest in portraying any pedophiles in a sympathetic light. We agree that the young are the appropriate focus. Maybe some day, when sympathetic shows about pedophilia are searching for a new angle, they will find that the older celibate pedophile is worth some time too. About the author: Ethan Edwards is a pseudonym. I am a pedophile, always celibate, and I have never seen child pornography. My attraction is strongest to girls around 4 years old, but I am also attracted to girls and women up through their 30s or beyond. Now in my late 60s, I'm divorced and living alone. I was married for over 10 years and was heavily involved with raising my 3 daughters. For most of my career I was a successful software engineer. I am very unusual for a pedophile in that I didn't realize that I was one until I was in my 50s—but it was there all along. I am angry that we all must remain silent or risk losing everything. That was my mindset when I co-founded Virtuous Pedophiles in 2012. I soon learned of the the terror of the typical pedophile who realizes as a teenager that his attraction isn't going to go away, who has nowhere to turn for help. The injustice I am most passionate about is the harsh legal penalties imposed on pedophiles who passively view illegal images of children. I stepped down from my role as a director of Virtuous Pedophiles early in 2024 and am delighted to pass the mantle on to a younger generation. This content was taken from Ethan's longstanding blog, Celibate Pedophiles. Some of the titles and taglines have been edited for their inclusion at thepword. You can see an earlier version of the blog at the wayback machine. |

other relevant items

other relevant items

discoveries on attraction and life partnerships |  | thread: autopedophilia and pedophilia |  | the mysteries of happiness, and how i found it as a pedophile
leonard johnston The evolution of my sexuality and my search for a life partnership. |  | bly Is there a difference between being attracted to a child and wanting to be a child? Yes. But there is also overlap. |  | leonard johnston I've never seen a self-help article aimed at pedophiles, so maybe it's time for one.

discoveries on attraction and life partnerships leonard johnston The evolution of my sexuality and my search for a life partnership.
thread: autopedophilia and pedophilia bly Is there a difference between being attracted to a child and wanting to be a child? Yes. But there is also overlap.
the mysteries of happiness, and how i found it as a pedophile leonard johnston I've never seen a self-help article aimed at pedophiles, so maybe it's time for one.