porn: desire overcomes morality for 40% of men

## porn: desire overcomes morality for 40% of men

#### 21 March 2016
from celibate pedophiles

### ethan edwards

| An article reports that the majority of people just don't think that porn is good. Naturally they are discussing ordinary porn with everyone over 18 years old. Ethan Edwards is the co-founder of Virtuous Pedophiles. Blog posts reflect his personal views, and are not statements from the organization. This article from 2 years ago reports that the majority of people just don't think that porn is good. Naturally they are discussing ordinary porn with everyone over 18 years old. A rather large majority think it is morally suspect (71%). The survey naturally found that men are somewhat more likely than women to think looking at porn is morally OK — but still only 35%.It is also widely assumed that large majorities of men do look at porn. As the article notes, Dan Savage thinks virtually all men do. There is the story of the researchers who set out to do a study contrasting men who had seen porn and who had not. They couldn't do the study because they couldn't find any men for the second group. Suppose we make an entirely reasonable estimate that 75% of men do look at porn at least occasionally for the usual purpose of sexual arousal. The survey found that only 35% of men think it is morally OK. This implies that 40% of men look at porn but think it is morally problematic. A natural explanation is that men's desire for sexual arousal and satisfaction is strong enough to overcome their own moral compass. When adverse effects on others are immediate, such as sexual harassment or the extreme of rape, the moral compass is usually strong enough to overcome the desire (though of course we should be aiming for 100% there, and failures can in no way be excused by a strong sexual desire). But when any ill effects are more distant and indirect, morality loses to sexual desire in a large percentage of men. I blogged earlier of why we should have compassion for CPviewers. One reaction people have is that only a disgusting, horrible person would seek out pictures of children for sexual arousal, so such disgusting, horrible people deserve harsh punishment. This is unfair, and I want to separate two parts. One question is why any decent person would find children sexually attractive. Modern science finds it is a desire that is . People are attracted to who they are attracted to. Now let's fold into the mix this present result that sexual desire makes 40% of ordinary men do something they think is morally wrong when there is no direct and immediate harm to others. We should expect that pedophiles have the same struggle between morality and desire. And it would be no surprise if 40% of pedophiles would also satisfy their desire with images in a way that poses no direct or immediate harm to anyone else. These are the men who look at CP. I hope that men look again at their utter disdain for how anyone could enjoy sexual images of children. For in large numbers they too look at images they find morally problematic for purposes of sexual satisfaction. They may be mystified as to why any men would find children attractive — though they are often equally mystified as to why gay men would find other men attractive. But if they can make that leap of faith, they should see in CP viewers other men with the same level of sexual desire doing the same thing they are doing. Women should take note too. They share this earth with men, who they find to be mostly decent people, and yet 40% of them look at porn even though it's against their moral beliefs. Let's have some compassion for pedophiles who look at CP — an activity which similarly poses no immediate, direct harm to anyone. About the author: Ethan Edwards is a pseudonym. I am a pedophile, always celibate, and I have never seen child pornography. My attraction is strongest to girls around 4 years old, but I am also attracted to girls and women up through their 30s or beyond. Now in my late 60s, I'm divorced and living alone. I was married for over 10 years and was heavily involved with raising my 3 daughters. For most of my career I was a successful software engineer. I am very unusual for a pedophile in that I didn't realize that I was one until I was in my 50s—but it was there all along. I am angry that we all must remain silent or risk losing everything. That was my mindset when I co-founded Virtuous Pedophiles in 2012. I soon learned of the the terror of the typical pedophile who realizes as a teenager that his attraction isn't going to go away, who has nowhere to turn for help. The injustice I am most passionate about is the harsh legal penalties imposed on pedophiles who passively view illegal images of children. I stepped down from my role as a director of Virtuous Pedophiles early in 2024 and am delighted to pass the mantle on to a younger generation. This content was taken from Ethan's longstanding blog, Celibate Pedophiles. Some of the titles and taglines have been edited for their inclusion at thepword. You can see an earlier version of the blog at the wayback machine. |

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ethics of images50

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practical advice on coming out |  | two audiences: pedophiles and public |  | a moment in the sun
ethan edwards Pedophiles often feel a desire to come out — to have their sexuality known. Here are some practical considerations. |  | ethan edwards My year 2014 posts were addressed primarily to a public that is skeptical of anything good or decent about pedophiles at all. |  | ender We're out there in the open, we're identifying openly as pedophiles, as people who are attracted to children through no choice of ours, and you know we're there to raise awareness and education.

practical advice on coming out ethan edwards Pedophiles often feel a desire to come out — to have their sexuality known. Here are some practical considerations.
two audiences: pedophiles and public ethan edwards My year 2014 posts were addressed primarily to a public that is skeptical of anything good or decent about pedophiles at all.
a moment in the sun ender We're out there in the open, we're identifying openly as pedophiles, as people who are attracted to children through no choice of ours, and you know we're there to raise awareness and education.